Sunday Ramblings

This is a war and not a battle; and to win this war, every small unit has to brave on. These were my thoughts as I woke up this morning. The night before I had gone to bed thinking of how the world has changed. How the daily sights and sounds have altered, bringing in regularly, the not so good ambulance sirens and the divine sunsets that previously one travelled far and wide for. It's really become a life of soldiering on.

The smallest unit in this war is the individual. And like in every way the units need to be patient, resilient, alert, prepared and most importantly adhering to protocol. It is tough following a daily routine of home chores and work, not being able to socialize, and cleaning and sanitizing every object one comes in contact with. Yet we need to be resilient in continuing with this new protocol. We need all our strength to be patient till that day when we can start socializing again. We need to be alert to our body and our mind because those are what we need to prepare the most against the vicious enemy, the virus! 

All units need reinforcement in the time of war. That timely call for help can draw the fine line between victory and a bravely lost battle. The help has to be for self care, mental and physical. The help has to be for those around us who need comforting or continuing with daily routines. The help has to be for the extraordinary circumstances that may arise. Being alert and prepared, one needs to draw on from others because right now we are all in the same boat! 

Community as a unit cannot be ignored. And that is where responsibility towards one another matters. We need to be empathetic in our approach of patient, resilient protocol administering. We need clear and alert communication of the situation, protocol and preparedness. And we need to respond in time and without discrimination in a call for help. But above all we need to know that if the individual does not do it's ask, the community accountability will not be of any use. 

Lastly it is the bodies of governance who make available the infrastructure, the enablers and the line of sight. Our governance bodies need to adopt more agility, higher tuning with the ground level events and suspend their own personal agendas till the war has been won. Once that their own battles can restart and they would not have lost much. But if personal ambition supercedes the larger goal, there will be no use of having achieved own goals. 

These are tough times that are drawing on mankind's ability to survive. And that not only means adapting ways we live, but also the way we think, execute and relate. Once this is over, those nations that come on top will be the ones who will emerge powerful, stronger and more united. Those that fall behind will have generations of pain that will be difficult to ease. We have the choice and we have the might. Question is whether our sight is fore or narrow...

A New Flight

In this topsy-turvy time, the one thing that has remained steadfast is the daily sunrise and sunset. In these uncertain times, the one thing that gives hope is the unrestricted and uninhibited flights of the soaring birds. In these strange times, the one thing that brings familiarity and comfort are those who you can be with. And that is what I saw as I walked this sixtieth evening of the corona quarantine times.

As the phone clicked to capture this image, I could not help but smile in gratitude and humility. Both the emotions came from three very different angles, three that I thought of sharing.

The very first one is in gratitude of nature and in humility of how even today, after humanity has plundered so much of it, nature seems to be working constantly to sustain humanity. The sun still shines to give us food, the rivers still flow to give us water and the wind still blows to ease the heat. Nature may want to reclaim its glory, but it is not blazing Armageddon. The warning shot may be with rage but not in revenge. It is those open spaces that have not been plundered to be populated by mankind that are sanctuaries of safety, and ready to take those who will accept the unfamiliar ways of life. Such love, compassion and tolerance are the most prominent traits of mothers and it is no wonder that from time in memorial we have been taught of the beauty of mother nature and mother earth. I bow down to the greatness of these mothers who are trying to forgive us and help us find a new way of life that may be more of collaboration and co-existence.

The second one is in gratitude of the untiring and heroic service of the front line workers, and in humility of the unrelenting human spirit.  These have not been easy times even for those who have comfort of a roof on their heads and food in their stomachs. And in these times when you want to be with the ones you love the healthcare workers are rallying day after day to ensure that they can help as many recover as possible, not just from corona but from other ailments as well. All the while being the most vulnerable to this so far incurable infection. Just as them, it is the law enforcers who hear the brickbats and the criticism and yet are out there to ensure that they can maintain discipline which is the first line of prevention in the current times; even if it means they catch the virus. Joining these brave forces are the city sanitation and cleanliness workers who are ensuring that the spread of other diseases is curtailed, the public transport employees who are getting all of the above to their stations of duties, the logistics teams ferrying medicine and food globally and locally to make sure everyone has enough, those who are getting the essentials to you and me putting themselves at risk and then there are the volunteers. There are so many other segments who are working to keep life as uncomplicated as it can be, that I cannot name them all here, but I sincerely salute them all.

And last but not the least I am in gratitude of the those who told me I was being a romantic, forcing me to see the other side of the coin and I am humbled by their acceptance of the stark reality. At the start of the pandemic, as India went into a lockdown, I said India would never be the same again. Of course, the world was never going to be the same again but the romantic in me theorised that this was the nation’s second world war moment. The moment where the millennials stopped to spend and started to save, where the entrepreneurs stopped to cut the pie and started to cooperate to grow the pie, and where the politicians forgot their differences and adopted bipartisanship to sail us through to the other side of the storm. What the last two months have highlighted though is while the millennials may be seeing a new way of life, our industry and political system is far too hard wired to bring in the shake that we need. It has been disappointing to say the least!  We could have done a lot more and for a lot less! We could have done for a lot more with a lot less! There truly have been some great decisions but the setback is when we look at some of the more recent decisions. They are not just confounding but incomprehensible. I want answers and have reached out for them but am but a mere ordinary citizen and hence received only what I deserve: silence. My balloon deflated, I feel defeated because probably naïve as it was, I overinvested in the belief of good and the judgement of the wise.

Yet in this defeat lies victory: victory of the human spirit of which mine is a part! I may have learnt a lesson but I am ready to embrace this new normal, ready to embody the sun daily and do my part, ready to hope again and fly with the birds and ready to stand with those who are mine because they are the ones who I answer to and who understand.

Be well and stay safe!

Nani, I miss you...

If I say it's the end of an era, I will probably be repeating the sentiments of the entire family. But for me it's truly the end of the era of selflessness, elegance, will power, dignity and giving. And nothing can ever replace Nani's (grandmother's) laughter. Nothing will ever feel as her saying beta (my child) did. Nothing will create the mischief in me as the intent to pull her leg. Nothing will ever replace the memories and impressions she has left behind. She taught me self reliance, made me capable of handling everything from the needle to the ladle and led by example on how to be resourceful. 

So as I see her missing from amongst all of us at the dinner table, I am left asking why did she leave. The adult and mature me sees how years of her suffering have ended and she is in a better place. But the granddaughter in me wants her around for the so many more occasions that I need to celebrate with her. The granddaughter in me wants to hear her voice so that I can hear her joy and happiness at moments that I crave to share with her. The granddaughter in me wants her to hold my hand as I need to know that she has my back just as she did when I was a child...

But when destiny calls; desires, wants, requests and pleas are of no use. In an instant life changes. There is no choice given but just fait accompli. With all power, influence, might, expertise and wealth, you are left helpless and unworthy of effort. I certainly don't think it's fair to the ones left picking up, though it may be fair for those who have less to suffer. But then my views can't change reality and all I can do is accept and move on. 

That is the toughest. To move on. She was a part of my dreams and there is a void that I don't know how to fill. One look at mother and masi (mom's sister), and I see their void bigger than mine. I keep my emotions intact because I can't let them breakdown. They are holding on strongly, one more than the other. One internalising and one expressing . One feeling bereft and the other cheated. One struggling and one searching.

The only time I lost control was when her last journey began. I wanted her to wake up. I did not want them to take her. I just did not know how to turn the clock back. But then I sank to the back and wiped my tears. I tried hard to regain control. I cannot overrule destiny and that is a limitation I must accept. So rather than controlling the circumstances I am attempting to control my own emotions. That's my great effort and my last tribute to my grandparents who are now all together in the heavenly abode. 

I miss her. I miss them. I don't think I will ever stop missing them or talking about them. But I will try to imbibe their qualities and lead a life that they will be proud of...