Sunday, 11 December 2016


Life is precious; all life is. Yet life has agonies - physical, mental and emotional. At one point in my life I have said that physical pain is bearable but emotional can be excruciating. Today, as I am writing this, I am aware of the physical and emotional suffering of a father and son and cannot even begin to think who needs to be saved first. 

It all started a few days ago with a heart attack. He was rushed to the hospital and on the Operating Table had another attack. In the ICU his kidneys and lungs started to give way. The son, living almost a twenty four hour journey away, was informed. He came to see his father on the ventilator; and then miraculously, as if nothing had happened, he was off the ventilator. Everyone was grateful and relieved when the coin turned again. Not only was he back on the ventilator but had to be wired up. In his concious state he is pulling and tugging at them and so the medical staff has tied his hands and legs. 

What is ravaging his body? What is gnawing at his brain? What emotional tsunami is the son enduring? What mental battle is junior trying to manoeuvre? I am trying not to think about it because reality of life is too harsh today.

The physical state is debilitating. It is heart wrenching. The emotional havoc is crippling. It is completely exhausting. If the physical pain is relieved the emotional pain will dive deeper, at least in the interim. If the emotional agony is given priority, the physical agony will only grind the emotional agony. Then there is the question of morality and ethics vs mortality and science. And then I come back to thinking, life is precious but the dignity is important too...

We are all, those who had the lucky draw of winning the parent lottery, products of the values and education provided, efforts and attempts made, and the love and care given by our parents. When they suffer the world seems to be unfair and the preciousness of life seems to diminish. How can the very givers of life, struggle in the jaws of undignified and intolerable pain? How can those who healed every little bruise, be forced to fight hell raising pain? How can the ones who gave all they could, have still to give when they have no more left? And why is it that at this point, the child, despite all desires, abilities and strength; can only stand and watch?

HP reports, he is sinking...I don't think it's him alone. It's him and junior. It's the end of an era approaching stealthily. May he be at ease. May junior be with strength...

Life is precious, and it is unpredictable. Life is precious, and it is short. Life is precious, and it is not in our control. And so I would take the moment I get, to let those I care for know that they are special. And so I would take the moment I get, and spend it with those who make a difference to my life. And so I take this moment to pray that even if it is not in my control, may life give me the opportunity and the time, to build memories that can last beyond a lifetime. 

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